“you can’t keep doing this to yourself,” myungsoo stares down at sungyeol draped across the grungy bathroom toilet, stains of questionable origins splattered across its porcelain surface and the surrounding tiles.

he wrinkles his nose in distaste, bending over to pat sungyeol on the back as he dry heaves once again, hacking and coughing up everything but his own soul before reaching a shaky hand to flush the stomach acid he did spit out down the drain.

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he stares out into the far horizon, gazing passed the great expanse of water stretching on and on as far as the eyes can see, looking beyond what is visible and searching for something his naked vision can’t quite reach.

the ocean is truly a great thing to behold, and the very thought of its endlessness and eternity suffocates him, like something big and heavy crushing down on his heart, an iron fist clenching around his lungs.

there’s both beauty and horror in the idea of something so everlasting, so steadfast.

but to him, at this moment, all he feels is the terrorizing hopelessness, of being trapped and bound forevermore in loneliness, unable to escape, unable to find deliverance, unable to find peace.

eternal.

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myungsoo has one very intense stare, sungyeol can definitely attest to this.

like sometimes, sungyeol swears he can actually feel myungsoo drilling a hole through the back of his skull with the force of that stare. and it makes him feel just a tad bit uncomfortable.

“why are you looking at me like that?” sungyeol squirms in his seat, slowly edging away from myungsoo and pressing himself as close as he physically can to the side of the van.

“huh?” myungsoo blinks, gazing at sungyeol in confusion as if he’d just been woken up from a deep sleep.

sungyeol frowns, somewhat perplexed, and sungjong laughs over myungsoo’s frequent absentmindedness.

“what was i doing?” myungsoo still doesn’t seem to catch on with the topic of conversation, and sungyeol decides to just let it go.

“never mind,” sungyeol turns away, staring out the window as buildings and cars zoom by.

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sungyeol digs his fingers into the fur of myungsoo’s padded parka, both boys stumbling across the empty dressing room until myungsoo’s back hits the long vanity table, miscellaneous makeup bottles and containers clattering to the floor.

“what are you doing?” myungsoo mumbles against sungyeol’s furiously moving lips, clutching onto the taller boy’s sides for support before his knees decide to give way.

“you’re mine,” sungyeol whispers aggressively, releasing his hold on the jacket and grabbing myungsoo’s waist to hoist him onto the tabletop. sungyeol’s lips make its way across myungsoo’s jaw, traveling down his neck where sungyeol’s mouth attaches itself to the soft, sensitive skin at the junction between myungsoo’s neck and shoulder.

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“okay myungsoo. seriously, this is the last time i’m going to say this. it’s time to wake up,” sunggyu shakes the mound of limbs and blankets curled on myungsoo’s bunk, an impatient noise clicking in the back of his throat when said lump refuses to move.

"fine. no more mister nice hyung,” sunggyu frowns, grasping the comforter and yanking it away and tossing it onto the floor. “really, myungsoo, you need to get… oh my god.”

myungsoo mumbles something incoherently, rolling over and burying his face into his pillow as sunggyu rudely flips him back over.

"what the heck,” myungsoo slurs, blindly waving his arms to bat the intruding hands away, when a piercing shriek jerks the sleepy boy into a seated position.

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myungsoo rubs away the last dregs of sleep from his eyes, scanning the dark room for the source of disturbance that had niggled him awake from a deep slumber that would normally have him sleeping through the worst typhoon without even a single flinch.

eyes still adjusting to the darkness around him, myungsoo’s gaze travels over the faint outline of sunggyu’s body curled under his blanket, moving up to a very much empty bunk where sungyeol should be sleeping.

myungsoo blinks in confusion, mind still muddled by sleep, as he stares blankly at the lack of human occupying sungyeol’s bed.

myungsoo blinks, and blinks some more, the cogs in his brain slowly shifting into gear.

where is sungyeol?

kicking off his blanket, myungsoo drags himself out of his warm, comfortable bed and tiptoes across the room to find that the door is already slightly ajar.

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